Committing To Commitment
Many commitments I have made over the years that I that I kept to myelf were easy to break. No harm no foul as far as I was concerned. Many commitments over the years I have made that I told my wife about that I didn’t keep. Now that is a different story. She now rolls her eyes when I declare, “I am going to take the dog for a walk every day. She needs the exercise and so do I”. Not only does she roll her eyes she walks away with a smile on her face. Oh, she knows me all too well. End of story? Dog gets out about 3 times a week. Good excuses though. Raining, too hot, too cold, the dog has a headache, can’t find her leash just to name a few.
But making a commitment to myself and to my wife are those that, unfortunately, I have learned to live with.
I loathe to make a commitment to God unless I know I will give it my best shot. When I fail on this one I can’t help but hang my head in shame. How many times have I looked up to the heavens and shrugged my shoulders as if to say. “Well, what did you expect?”
I know He will forgive and forget. After all I am only harming my own faith or lack of it.
The worst though was making a declaration, a commitment to others outside the inner sanctum of the big three mentioned above.
Many of my commitments were innocuous, not so important as far as I was concerned to the saving of the world. Like the time I said I was going to lose 10 pounds. One pound a month for ten months. I quit after day 3. On more than one occasion.
I have done this so many times over the years that it has become a bad habit in my life that I have only recently in the past few years realized that it was actually something that was holding me back from going forward. I had become a perpetual quitter.
My motto must have been “when the going gets tough, quit.”
This is turning into a full-fledged confession.
A few years ago when I first started blogging. I found myself in a whole new world, new language, new technology. I was excited with the potential of learning to write and put it out there for others to read. I had high hopes. Many would flock to my site, read, be wowed, even write me an email.
I committed to writing one post a week for one year and then re-access.
After three weeks I was ready to burn my computer. After 2 months I was prepared to leave home but, respite, I got my first follower. Look out world here I come to save you. After 4 months I quit ( new record though). I had enough, what was the purpose of writing and putting it out there for all to see if no one is going to read it.
After a month of trying to do other things, this nagging feeling wouldn’t go away. I felt like a quitter, again. There was only one thing I could do. Sink or swim.
I went back and finished my 52 posts, my one year completed and then gave it away, for a time. The feeling of accomplishment though was good and since that time I have become acutely aware of my commitments large or small.
I know I am a slow learner but a learner none the less.
Bottom line? It taught me the importance that, If I was going to go out on a ledge and commit myself to something, anything, no matter how big or small then I had to follow through. It was my word at stake, to me, to my wife and family to my friends and most importantly to God.
In light of what I am saying I have made a commitment when it comes to hitting that “like button” on our blogs.
When someone writes a post and puts their heart out there for all to see it means something. I believe it’s important that when someone “likes” your post that they have actually read it. So I will not (by the grace of God) hit the like button unless I have actually read the post all the way through and the words in the post did something for me.
I say that because that is how I would want those to view my blog posts.
“You cannot make a real commitment unless you accept that it’s a choice that you keep making again and again and again” (Author unknown)